Writing in Happiness

I found a friend on Facebook. I had not met him for nearly half a century since the beginning of my teaching career. It immediately evoked very sweet memories of my first teaching post at a kampung (village) secondary school.

I began writing my thoughts of that nostalgic period of my life. It was in Kampung Astana Raja where I was shown so much love and respect. I was treated like one of their own by the kampung folk.

After school hours, I was able to enjoy fishing by the small ponds around the village and the irrigation canals of the rice fields. On weekends, I was invited to rather a lot of wedding kenduris (feasts) where I was able to relish minangkabau (tribal) delicacies. On Hari Raya (Eid), I was showered with lots of local food and cookies by the students.

 This teaching stint was rather short but it was indeed one of the happiest times of my life.

I have discovered writing and the power it holds to transport me anywhere, at anytime, beyond the restriction of my life. I have been able to recall happy times. I have found it to be very cathartic, indeed.

ltbs

Do the thing you believe in. Do the best you can in the place you are and be kind.

Scott Nearing

Dedicated in gratitude and friendship to YAA Tan Sri Mohd Raus Sharif - President of the Court of Appeal, Malaysia. He was one of my former students in Kampung Astana Raja where I was shown so much love and respect. His parents were especially kind to me.

Grandson for Courage

I have a little retreat in the suburb of my home city. I only spend my mornings there – reading, gardening or doing nothing – just enjoying being there. I never spend any dark evening there as I suffer greatly from phasmophobia – the fear of ghosts. I have never spent any nights there, either.

It took the company of my grandson, Daniel, who is only two and a half years old to give me the courage to spend the night there. I babysat him when he was home on holiday. We spent three nights at the retreat.

On the first night, I turned on all the lights at the pied-ā-terre. I had the lights in the bedroom switched on, too. I found it most difficult to go to bed as my imagination of ghosts had gone to overdrive. I was so terribly frightened that some spirits might suddenly appear that I had an extremely restless night.

The second night was better as I had a bit more courage then. I was able to go to bed albeit with some difficulty.

I found myself better relaxed on the third night. Daniel had finally given me the courage to be there that night.

But do you think I will be able to spend a night, all by myself, there after this?

ltbs

Coward – one who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.

Ambrose Bierce

Enema Again and Again

I was unable to empty my bowels after I suffered a serious spinal ailment, years ago. I was bed-bound and had to lie totally flat on a plaster-of-Paris bed which was placed on a wooden frame. I just couldn't move my bowels with the bedpan, placed under my bottom, below the plaster-of-Paris bed.

The surgeon first, asked the hospital dietician to put me on a diet of lots of fruit and fruit juices but that did not help to stimulate the evacuation of my bowels. Then he prescribed an aperient  -  a mild laxative  -  but the medicine had no effect. Stronger laxatives were not effective, either. 

Finally, the surgeon had to resort to having the nurses give me enemas. I wonder whether this practice is still being used today in modern medicine. A liquid, (soapy, I think) was poured, via a funnel connected to a tube with its nozzle stuck deeply in my anus, into my rectum to irritate or stimulate my bowels to empty.

A foldaway screen was placed around my bed when the enema was given. I was quite embarrassed when the enema started working as the sound of breaking wind, the sound of the spurts of liquid together with the faeces and the stench would fill the whole ward.

I had to be given an enema once a week. Every Wednesday was enema-day! I dreaded that very much. Can you imagine the embarrassingly horrible smell and sound stimulated by the enema when I was emptying my bowels? I was continuously being given the enemas for more than six months until I was allowed to walk with a heavy plaster-of-Paris casing around my upper torso to protect my spine. I was then able to easily empty my bowels sitting on the toilet bowl.

ltbs

Got no check books, got no banks,
Still I'd like to express my thanks  -
I got the sun in the mornin'
And the moon at night.
Irving Berlin

Writing to No One

I write on the Net  -  writing to no one in particular. I share my emotions  -  my joy and my pains. I am proud to showcase my family and friends who have been kind to me. What's wrong with this?

Whenever I'm troubled, I just pour out my feelings into the Blue Nothing. I tend to be rather very insular on a personal level but not on the Net.  My troubles seem to shoot into the infinite caldera of Cyberspace, taking the demons that torture my soul with them.

Writing has been very cathartic for me. This has been my way of keeping ennui and boredom at bay, too. 

ltbs

For me, writing is foremost a mode of thinking and, when it works well, an act of discovery.

Joseph Epstein

Won a Nobel Prize?

My books will never win a Pulitzer Prize
Neither will they win a Booker Prize,
As they aren't very special at all
Enjoyable only to a few readers.

My books are quick reads
Having one-page stories of my life
Exaggerating, telling a few white lies
I've made something out of nothing of my simple life.

I feel rather blithesome
When total strangers getting my books,
Enjoy them thoroughly
Making me feel like I've won a Nobel Literature Prize!

ltbs

Maggie and I read through the series of your books from Liz and we saw fitting to have them in our library and therefore our request for the books.
We thoroughly enjoy the books! Particularly, the articles are short and meaningful, reflecting realities of our upbringings.
George Lim and Maggie 

Toronto, Canada

Why Torture Myself

The very first time I played football in England was against the school XI of St Chad's in Wolverhampton. This was the time when Wolves  -  Wolverhampton Wanderers  -  was one of the top teams in the EPL and the late Sir Alexander Matthew "Matt" Busby was the manager of Manchester United. This was six years after the plane crash in Munich which almost wiped out the MU team. That was a very long time ago...a truly long time ago!

On the afternoon of the match, it was very cold and damp as it was winter then. It drizzled before the game and then it started to rain after we kicked off. However, we were not soaked as the rain was rather light.

The match saw us being completely outclassed by the boys who stayed on our half most of the time. I had hardly any chance to kick the ball. I would just pace along the right wing, with my arms folded and my hands under my armpits trying to keep warm. The score at half-time was 4-0 in the schoolboys' favour.

During the second half, sleet fell and then followed by a short spell of snow. The schoolboys had complete possession of the ball so I had nothing to do on the right wing. I was extremely cold.  Just a few minutes before the end of the game, small hailstones rained down on us, too.

We lost 12-0 but we were too numbed with cold to feel or care about the defeat. It was my first encounter with the wet weather in England. But it was not as bad as fielding on a cricket match  - playing at slips  -   and standing in the windy cold for ages. I wonder why I tortured myself then by choosing to take up these two games in the UK, where we lost badly all the time, and had to endure the terrible, cold, windy weather.

ltbs

If you can't accept losing, you can't win.
Vincent Lombardi

Why Poison the Fish?

I was quite puzzled, one day, to find a few Sultan Fish (leptobarbus hoeveni)  -   ikan jelawat  - floating dead in my pond in my front garden. Each fish was about a foot long but was not suitable for the table due to its mysterious death so the stray cats were given a feast by me.

The pump was working well and the water level in the pond was all right. It had also been raining daily. The fish should be able to thrive in the pond. It was a mystery why the fish had died.

However, I found a whiskey bottle-stopper floating on the surface of the pond that morning. I guess the cause of the death of the fish might be due to intoxication or poison. A bottle of whiskey or poison must have fallen into the pond. I wonder whether the bottle had fallen from the sky like in the film The Gods Must be Crazy.
I closed up the pond after that unfortunate, mysterious incident.

I was quite puzzled, too, to find a young, inflorescent-bearing coconut tree wilting in my backyard, a few years ago, on my return from an oversea vacation. There was a ring of dried grass caused by the pouring of derv around the base of the tree. The palm soon withered and died due to the diesel-poisoning. This was another mystery that had yet to be solved.

ltbs

To withstand the assaults of envy, you must be either a hero or a saint.

Publius Syrus

Why Not Make Some Money from It?

I met a former schoolmate for coffee at a food court. After a pleasant chat, I asked him whether he could help sponsor the printing cost of my book.

Without any hesitation, he handed me a generous sum of money and said, "Why not make some money for yourself? Keep a bit of the proceeds. Why donate everything to charity organizations?"

I guess, he was thinking of my welfare as he knew of my financial position of not drawing a pension or having any EPF.

But I replied, "It's OK. I'm OK with it. The charity organizations can keep 100% of the proceeds. The printing cost will have been borne by others like you included. I won't have to stump up anything."

Again, he said, "You should keep something for yourself".

I continued, "I'm OK. I don't yearn for any worldly possessions at this stage of my life. I'm satisfied with whatever little I have. I've more than enough to spend with the generous pocket money from my children. I'm also thankful to my wife for her strong financial support, too. I pray that the Good Lord will continue to keep me healthy".

ltbs

The day, water, sun, moon, night  -  I do not have to purchase with money.

Titus Maccius Plautus

Why Do I Weep?

Someone's been very kind to me
It drives me into a pensive mood,
And I weep.

I weep 'cause I'm unable to reciprocate
For that someone's got everything,
And isn't in need of anything.

I'd just pray to the Good Lord,
To reward that someone
Who's been so very kind to me.

ltbs

The making of friends who are real friends is the best token we have of a [person's] success in life.
Edward Everett Hale

Dedicated in gratitude and friendship to Datin Peggy Lim and Dato' John Lim

Why Can't I Escape from People Unkind?

Every now and then
I'd encounter some people unkind,
And I'd run away from them every time
But new people would take their place.

I'm so sick and tired in my heart,
To keep on meeting people unkind
Is there anything intrinsically wrong with me?
Why can't I escape from such people?

ltbs

Your own soul is nourished when you are kind; it is destroyed when you are cruel.
Proverbs 11:17

Who is Your God?

You speak of God,
You praise Him, always.
But who is your God?
When you show no charity towards others?

I am but a poor sinner,
But God's been kind to me
Making me strong and confident
To be indifferent towards any holier-than-thou.

ltbs

Counting other people’s sins does not make you a saint.
Author Unknown

Who am I?

I'm just a simple soul who enjoys sharing my thoughts with others – I’m, but a Nobody.

I have literally opened up my soul in my writings. Those who read my books will come to know a bit about me. Those who thought they knew me would also know more about me.

ltbs

I am simply what I am, or I begin to be that. I live in the present. I only remember the past and anticipate the future. I love to live.

Henry David Thoreau

Where Have All the Young Men Gone?

Robbing the cradle or lucking out
Aged Lotharios have been finding success
With young girls more than half their age
To relive the romances of their youth.

Some lounge lizards have found instant success with their money,
While other rakehells with their gift of the gab
And indulge in licentious liberties with the young ladies
With the help of Viagra or some other aphrodisiacs.

But the young girls are no naive Lolita
Of Vladimir Nabokov fame,
They are much more experienced and wily
Than the silly old goats who flaunt them so lecherously.

ltbs

Stupidity always saves a man from going mad.
Oliver Wendell

What's Enough to the Young?

How annoyed and frustrated can a father be,
When contrary to his advice, in this recession-looming time,
A daughter refuses to accept a supposedly high-paying job
Because she feels RM200K per year is not satisfactory enough?

How troubled and unhappy can a father be,
When contrary to his advice, in this recession-looming time,
A son wishes to resign from a truly high-paying job
Because he feels RM300K per year is not challenging enough?

ltbs

How simple and frugal a thing is happiness, a glass of wine, a roast chestnut…the sound of the sea.

All that is required to feel that here and now is happiness is a simple, frugal heart

Nikos Kazantzakis

Whatever I Was, I’m Not Now

I used to be touchy, aggressive and rather choleric,

Woe betided anyone who crossed me.

You wouldn’t like me then

I wouldn’t like myself, either

I was rather obnoxious – a real ogre  -

As I had so many demons in my head, then.

I’m delighted that

Whatever I was, I’m not now

I don’t take offences easily

Neither do I react to offensive people

I’d remain totally calm and indifferent

As I’ve cleared rather a few demons from my head.

ltbs

The most memorable people in life will be the friends who loved you when you weren’t very lovable.

Author Unknown

What Makes Me Smug?

I felt smug when I caught a self-righteous someone sneaking quickly out of a prostitute-den, as I sat having a meal by the casement at a restaurant opposite.

His secret would be safely embedded in me as no one would know of his indiscretion  -  neither his wife nor anyone else.

However, from that incident onwards, I will smirk a little whenever he struts and swaggers self-righteously in front of little-devil-me.

ltbs

Whoever sins least, he is the best man; for no man is innocent, no one free from blame.
Epicharmus

What do Young Girls Want?

"My daughter's divorcing her husband," a friend confided in me one day. "She phoned him about it while she was on a taxi from work!"

" Which one of your daughters? " I asked, as I knew my friend had five very beautiful and lovely daughters.

"The third one – she’s found him too boring." he answered.

I was quite taken aback by the daughter's reason for divorcing her husband. They had just been married for about three years.

I remembered another friend, who was in his seventies, confiding in me that he was having a thing going with a twenty-year-old college student. I did not believe him at all. I thought it was just an old man’s fantasy. 

I wondered whether it could be true after all as my friend's supposedly paramour had a young boyfriend and had found the young fellow boring, too. So she had sought the companionship of my old friend instead!

This sets me thinking about what young girls want nowadays.

ltbs

Love… includes fellowship in suffering, in joy and in effort.

Albert Schweitzer

What a Lucky Escape

I stood on a low ledge, one day, to place some kibbles on an awning for a stray cat. Then I jumped down from the ledge but I found myself suddenly slipping and sliding down on the slippery floor. I instinctively used my right hand to break my fall but landed hard on my bottom. Except for the excruciating pain on my right bottom, a slight pain on my right palm and feeling a tinge of pain on my neck, too, I was all right.

Looking back, I realized that I had escaped from serious injuries. I could have hurt myself terribly had the back of my head not missed hitting the hard concrete ledge. It was a very lucky escape, indeed.

Well, the upside of that incident was that it somewhat uplifted me. I felt that the Good Lord had protected me.

ltbs 

There is luck in sharing a thing.

Irish Saying

Warm Hospitality in South Korea

When we were in South Korea, we were invited to stay with a rice-farmer a couple of hundred kilometres from Seoul, the capital city.

Our friend – the farmer – fetched us from our hotel in Seoul. The drive from the city first ended in a large village restaurant. The food was truly local Korean fare which included a few items new to me  -  small chilled, raw crabs in a kind of dark sauce, fresh slices of skate in a tasty sauce, sliced pieces of duck which tasted a bit like salami, a creamy, soft, white tofu curd and jelly made from acorn powder (the items were translated to me on the iPhone by my host when I enquired what they were).  We were, then, shown round the village before ending up at the host's.

At his home, there was another meal waiting for us! It was prepared by his wife. This time, the food was something different; among the dishes was a dish of raw salmon and tuna.   Korean beer, home-brewed rice wine, ginseng wine and home-made apple and plum cider were passed round as we sat on the floor  -  dining around a low table. I had been a teetotaler for years but to be polite to the host family, I opted for the low-alcoholic cider!

The double-storey farm house was very modern. It was centrally-heated but the heat could be adjusted for every room individually. I found the heat too warm for me, so I had it turned off in my room. I had the window slightly ajar and I found it very comfortable with a cold draught blowing in.

It was a most enjoyable stay in the countryside as the farmer and his family were most hospitable to us.

ltbs

Similarity of outlook creates friendship.

Democritus

Uplifting Encounters at an IRB Office

Having encountered rude taxi drivers, crude bus-drivers and haughty Government officers, it was a change, indeed, to find very friendly, caring and helpful officers at my local Inland Revenue office when I went there to do the e-filing of my income tax returns.

You should be there to see how friendly, caring and helpful the IRB officers were. Every one of them was very patient with the tax-payers who had come to do the e-filing of their income tax. Quite a few of the tax-payers were extremely slow and were only able to use a single finger in keying and completing the forms but the officers were very gentle and patient in helping them.

E-filing my tax returns always makes me sad after  I calculate that  my present annual income is less than my monthly income when I was gainfully employed, before my retrenchment, ages ago. I felt sickeningly upset that I was a "poor rich"!

However, the friendly atmosphere at the IRB office helped to lessen the pain of feeling poor! It uplifted me to feel fortunate to have an understanding, very financially-strong wife and three wonderful, very filial, generous children. I came away from the Inland Revenue office thanking the Lord for enabling me to lead a simple but fun-filled life albeit with no pension or any EPF. I felt rich, indeed!

ltbs

Lives based on having are less free than lives based either on doing or on being.

William James

Two Very Talented Souls

One was a talented musician  -
A guitarist extraordinaire
But he gave up music very early in his life
Quitting the band and playing music completely
No one knew why!

The other represented his country at tennis  -
A player extraordinaire
But he gave up tennis very early in his life, too
Quitting the national team and playing tennis completely
No one knew why!

ltbs

Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow talent to the dark place where it leads.
Erica Jong

Dedicated to the memory of my uncle, Francis Yen, and a friend, Simon Yeo 

Two Cyberspace Romances

They fell in love in Cyberspace,
She was twenty-seven
He was a year older
And when they met in person
They couldn't have enough of each other
And after a year, they got married
But, alas, disillusionment soon set in
And in a space of three years.
They got divorced
And she emigrated to start anew.

They met in Cyberspace, too
She was twenty
He was very much older
As she was blind to his age
He was able to excitedly relive his youth
And from the outset, they agreed
To have no strings attached
With no demands on each other, whatsoever
But just enjoyed being together, whenever possible
Until she left for further studies abroad.

ltbs

All the lonely people
where do they come from?
All the lonely people
where do they belong?
John Lennon

Truly Blessed

It's snowing and it's very cold
I'm chilled to my every bone
But in the strange quietness of Bad Godesberg
I think of friends who have been kind to me
It sort of warms up my simple soul.

As the snow-flakes flutter down
I thank the Lord for such countless friends
Who have treated me so well
Without asking for anything in return
Indeed, I feel that I'm truly blessed.

ltbs

A true friend loves at all times

Proverbs 17:17

Treated Like a King

I met a former boarding mate when I was in England recently. After some pleasant talk, we chatted about his children.  He told me that his only son had married a princess of a Middle Eastern royal family and started talking about her.

He could not stop telling me how wonderful she was. He was beaming with pride that the princess treated him  -  a commoner  -  with much respect and dignity. He said she had not behaved like a princess with him. Instead, she treated him like she would treat her father  -  the king of the Middle Eastern country. She treated him like a king. He deemed himself fortunate, indeed, to have such a wonderful daughter-in-law as she had been showing him much love and deference.

I could not help but be happy for him. He was one fortunate father-in-law, don't you think so?

ltbs


Grandparents who want to be truly helpful will do well to keep their mouths shut and their opinions to themselves until these are requested.
T Terry Brazelton

Travel Happy – Travel Light

I think whenever you fly for vacations, you should travel light  -  always travel light  -  no bulky suitcases. Don't check in any luggage, either.

What clothes to take with you:-

·         2 or 3 light cotton non-iron or mercerized cotton shirts. ( mercerized cotton will be cooler and will not stink with BO)

• 2 or 3 pairs of underwear
• 2 or 3 pairs of light material socks

Wash your daily wear with body wash or body shampoo every evening. Hang it up in your hotel room and it will be dried the next morning.

If you visit your relatives, do your own washing this way, too. Easy, isn’t it?

Too much clothing will be redundant, after all, you're on holiday, and not at a fashion show.
For winter, you just add in a jacket, pullover or cardigan, a pair of gloves, deerstalker or balaclava, and a scarf.

Go on your own. It's very easy now with the computers. Don't go on conducted tours. You may see more places on conducted tours but on your own you truly see much more of a few places.
Experience staying in budget hotels or hostels...they are always in the city centres. You can select the lodgings with the computers.

ltbs

He, who would travel happily, must travel light.

Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Tranquillity after Intense Fury

An eruption of frenzied fury over an unfortunate incident,
Would trigger off rays of heat from one's ears
And fiery breath from one's nostrils
Which one would be unable to put a stop to, immediately.

Then, as the anger slowly subsides,
One's able to ignore the ugly incident
And push it away from one's mind
Eventually experiencing a kind of tranquillity.

ltbs

I was angry with my friend:
I told my wrath, my wrath did end.
I was angry with my foe:
I told it not, my wrath did grow.
William Blake

Toot for Fun

Learning to play a trumpet is rather difficult.

I remember when I first started learning to play one; I could not toot any sound from it. I had to take the mouthpiece out of it and practise on the mouthpiece. I would purse my lips and blow hard but except, for lots of saliva, not a peek came out of it. Eventually, after trying for about a week, I learned that I had to purse my lips and sort of spit into the mouthpiece to get the sound.

Then it was learning to play the trumpet by tooting musical notes, one by one, from a beginner’s book. Soon I was able to play simple tunes and from there to progress to more difficult pieces. I had to learn to play classical pieces for my music course. After a few months, I was quite adept at playing the trumpet. Eventually, I was able to pass a trumpet practical trumpet test. However, I was deemed not good enough to play the trumpet in an orchestra but I only remember playing a ratchet in a performance of The Toy Symphony.

However, on returning home after my music training, music did not play a major part in my work. My trumpet became a recreational instrument. I only played it for fun.

ltbs

After silence that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music.

Aldous Huxley

To Spam or Not to Spam

Being the owner of several Yahoo e-groups, I found myself losing interest in them after I had been "rubbished" or even lambasted by a few members of a particular group for being a spam- artiste. The last straw was having my computer attacked and disabled by a virus while vetting mail to forward.

Then I read an email from a friend in Australia which said:
"... had a fall, resulting in broken bones in 18 places, including several ribs. She has osteoporosis and a fall can do enormous damage. She is in pain most of the time. She is likely to be there for a while as there is nothing much that can be done except constant doses of painkillers".

The sender of the e-mail and his friends were the ones who had got the lady with the brittle bones interested in the computer and had then introduced her into one of my e-groups.

That email got me interested in continuing to source for exciting stuff on the Net to share with my e-groups as the lady in the hospital was one of the few members who had written earlier to me thanking me for my work. She had also told me that she had always looked forward to my daily postings.

ltbs

We live in others, and they in us.
Sigmund Freud


In fond memory of Margaret Wong, RIP, Adelaide, Australia

This is the Way to Write

This is the Way to Write

I was surprised to receive a phone call from someone one day. He told me that his friend had given him one of my books. He then started to tell me how I should have written the book. He said that every essay should start with an introduction, followed by a body and then a conclusion. Finally, he named a book by a local writer that I should read to improve my writings.

I was rather piqued but I kept quiet. He was one of the many who had refused to look at, let alone buy any of my books at any of the charity sales. They had felt that they were better than I, although they had not written or published anything.

I don't normally reply to critics. I know I'm no academic. I'm thankful to have lots of fans who enjoy my books.

ltbs

Second-rate minds usually condemn everything beyond their grasp.

La Rochefoucauld

The Wonders of Travel

Pack your bags and travel sometimes,
Leave your troubles behind
Dine, shop and sightsee
Or just sit on a street bench
And watch the world go by
And you'll come home
With a better perspective of life.

ltbs

If you wish to travel far and fast, travel light. Take off all your envies, jealousies, unforgiving anger, selfishness and fears.
Glenn Clark

The Sound of Silence

Silence from friends  

Can be quite disquieting
But it can be wonderful, too.
One can enjoy one's own thoughts.

Welcome the sound of silence,
Bring in happy thoughts
And invite solitude to one's side
To soothe one's heart.

ltbs

A hushed heart hears the unuttered word.

Sri Aurobindo

The Sad Plight of a Friend

I encountered a bagpipe busker on a street in Melbourne one day which quickly evoked memories of my visit to Scotland. I remembered listening to the music of a bagpiper on a street in Edinburgh. Unlike the one in Melbourne who was dressed in a T-shirt and a pair of jeans, the one in Edinburgh was kilt in the full regalia of a Scot fusilier. The lilting music of the bagpipes in Melbourne reminded me a very warm and generous friend in Elgin who took us all over northern Scotland, from the ski resort of Cairngorm to the shores of Loch Ness.

As the Melbourne bagpiper began to play a haunting tune, it put me in a sombre and pensive mood. I began to think of the plight and suffering of that friend in Elgin. She suffered greatly and traumatically a few years after our visit, when she had to opt out of work to nurse her husband who had an inoperable brain tumour. He was an RAF ace pilot who had flown sorties during the Falkland War. It must have been a very daunting and heart-wrenching time for her to see her husband suffering terribly and his life slowly ebbing away.

As I walked away from the Melbourne busker, I could not help but feel sad for my friend.
I was like a zombie after encountering the busker as I continued my walk around Melbourne. I did not enjoy the sights at all.

I felt better after I visited the cathedral. I experienced tranquility as I sat on a pew thinking of my life. I began to realize that I am blessed, indeed, to have encountered so many people in my life from simple fishermen or farmers to high-ranking professionals, diplomats, politicians or religious leaders who have shown so much kindness to me. My great regret has been that I have not been able to reciprocate in any way.

ltbs

The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.

Harriet Beecher Stowe

The Passing of a Survivor

My second brother, John, passed away on 1 January  -  the New Year in 2012. He was supposed to have his gangrenous foot amputated after the New Year but the gangrene got to him first.

John had a very hard life. He had to stop school when my father was incapacitated by illness and lost everything. He joined the Kinta Valley Home Guards as a private soldier but managed to rise in rank to corporal. However, he was soon demobilized when The Malayan Emergency ended.

Handicapped by limited education, he was unable to find gainful employment so he rented a small car from one of his former colleagues and ran a pirate taxi service plying between Ipoh and Singapore. Life was tough for him as the earnings were quite meagre as he had to pay bribes whenever he was caught by traffic police or road transport officers. Finally, he had to stop when the heat became too much and there was the fear of imprisonment if nabbed again by the authorities.

He then managed to rent a stall at a new market to sell poultry. However, the market was about ten kilometres from his home. He had to get up at around 3.30am daily and cycle to the market. He did this for years until he was able to buy a small Honda motorbike.

John did everything to provide and bring up a family of five. He was a survivor. It was unfortunate that he would miss the convocation of his oldest grandchild who would graduate a week after his demise. However, everyone would remember John's death on every New Year in the future.

ltbs

If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his own family, he has disowned the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
Paul 1 Timothy 5:8

To the memory of my brother, John - a dedicated and caring person.

The Naivety of It All

It is such a wretched feeling  -
Gnawing into the innermost of one's soul
To discover that one's been taken in.
One feels like wringing the culprit's neck
And telling everything to the whole world
But a sudden feeling of calm fills one's soul
When one decides not to do so
As one deems one's fortunate enough
To have stumbled on the on-going treachery
And not to naively trust that culprit ever again.

One will have the satisfaction
Of preventing it ever happening again
And the Judas of a friend will soon realize
That the Sherlock Holmes in one
Has finally detected the let-down
Should the culprit, in simmering excitement,
Try to commit that selfish act again
But won't be able to do so
And so go away greatly disappointed
Making one feeling satisfied and elated.
.
ltbs

Never lie to someone who trusts you.

Never trust someone who lies to you.

Author Unknown

The Me in Me

Re-thinking my whole life?
My needs,
My priorities,
My desires
Should I pay more attention to the me in me?
Not letting other people walk all over me anymore?
Not living my life for other people?

I've decided to remain my simple self  -
A self that's been discovered by my writings
And nurtured by friends and loved ones  -
Confident, grateful and easy-going  -
Staying away from small-minded people
Continuing to run away from them, double quick
And paying more attention to the me in me.

ltbs

He who sets a high value upon himself has the less need to be esteemed by others.

Samuel Butler

The Makings of a Writer

I've always found it extremely difficult to put words on paper with my biro, but whenever I sit in front of a computer, I've found it rather easy to spin stories of my daily life, with my fingers doing all the talking. They seem to fly on the keyboard with not much effort as I twirl and spin stories into Cyberspace.

I write to no one in particular but mainly to myself. I use the figment of my imagination and creative licence to colour the nothingness of my simple life. I thank the Lord for this simple gift to enjoy life with my writings.

ltbs

All writing comes by the grace of God.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

The Little Museum in Us

Would you believe that within the darker reaches of everyone's mind is a museum?
There are artifacts there  -  dusty, mouldy and cob-webbed. Some pretty, some not so. Some people are fortunate to have lots more pretty artifacts than ugly ones while others the reverse.

Unfortunately, I have lots more dreadful artifacts than beautiful ones in the museum within me. I have been unfortunate to start acquiring the horrible ones at a very young age. I would like to throw the ghastly ones away but they are so terribly entrenched. Every now and then, some external forces would chip their aged patina and those artifacts would appear causing me to bleed a little.

However, I am grateful for both the scary and wonderful mementos deep within me. I have something to write about. But I have decided to always put the old and ugly ones in a better, lighter vein or not write about them at all.

Writing might sweep away the dust, the moulds and the cob-webs from that little museum within me but it helps to keep Alzheimer's disease and dementia at bay.

ltbs

Why do you wonder that globe-trotting does not help you, seeing that you always take yourself with you? The reason which set you wandering is ever at your heels.
Socrates

The Good Lord Protected Daniel

I woke up in the middle of the night when we were in Luxemburg. I immediately saw that my grandson, Daniel, had fallen out of bed.  He was lying a distance away from the bed on the cold floor. I got up, then got down on my knees, to carry him up.

As I heaved myself up with Daniel cradled in my arms, I slipped and fell horizontally forward. The momentum of my weight carried me forcefully like a torpedo along the slippery floor towards the bed. I hit my right hand on an iron bar at the side of the bed as I slid sideways down hitting my nose and then my upper lip. I experienced a momentary flash of light in my eyes and finally coming to rest on my back. 

Fortunately - very fortunately - Daniel did not suffer any injuries except to be woken by the fall. Thank God for that.

Everything happened in a split of a second. I could only relate it after looking back. The momentum of the fall must have been very powerful as I could see, in the morning, a dark-bluish, purplish swelling on my right hand which had broken the fall. Blood had also dripped from both my nostrils then but it fortunately, stopped eventually. However, it still oozed out a little bit, later in the morning. I had aches on both my shoulder blades. I looked like I've been through a fist fight with my swollen nose and a small cut on upper lip. Fortunately, I need not have to ask Santa Claus for two front teeth.

It would have been horrendous had Daniel been hurt as the force of the fall was extremely forceful, indeed. I continue to thank the Lord for protecting him from that fall.

ltbs

Lift up your eyes and see; who created these?

Isaiah 40:25

The Gift of Silence

"Dice qualcosa, Luca. Non tenere il silenzio," the mother of our host, said to me, in the midst of dinner at a restaurant, widely touted to have the best pizzas in Turin.

I just smiled at her and continued to remain quiet. She had asked me to say something and not remain silent.

I had been enjoying the conversation of the others at the dinner. It was one of the best meals I ever had.

I would usually prefer to remain silent while others talked and talked whenever I got together with friends. Silence was a gift I would always remember to bring them!

ltbs

Learn to be silent.

Let your quiet mind listen and absorb.

Pythagoras

Dedicated in gratitude and friendship to Marco D’Acri, Diana & Anna, of Grugliasco,Turin, Italy 

The Confession of a Simple Soul

I lead a very simple life now but looking back on my life, I think I have led quite a colourful one indeed, albeit not one with a chequered career.

It has been filled with a lot of excitement and wonder. Of course, it has also been fraught with disappointment, serious illnesses and traumas. It has given me quite a lot of different experiences though, don’t you think so?

I guess not many people really knew me. Some thought they did but they knew me only at a particular stage of my life.

I am no saint but I have always been keeping to the straight and narrow, thanks to a very strict religious upbringing.

However having been through the fright of having breast cancer and undergoing a bi-lateral subcutaneous mastectomy, the Mr Hyde of my character has emerged the stronger compared to the Dr Jekyll. Of course, a few “holier-than-thou” are now shunning me because of that.

But it’s good riddance to bad rubbish, as I have so many other people who value my friendship which has made me very confident in life, indeed.

ltbs

Enjoy the simple, the natural and the plain.

Along with that comes the ability to do things spontaneously and have them work.

Benjamin Hoff

The Best Noodles in Town

After a walk in the park one very early morning, I drove to my favourite coffee shop for curry mee (curry noodles) which had been touted as the best in the city.
On that morning when I approached the lady to order a bowl of it, she told me to hold on as she was waiting for the vegetable-seller to bring the bean sprouts for the noodles. She asked me to have coffee first.

As I was drinking the coffee, she waited outside the coffee-shop for the man. Then I saw her bending down and blowing her nose into the gutter. Getting up, she pinched her nostrils with the forefinger and the thumb of her right hand and then wiped the remaining oozing mucus away by first, sliding her thumb left across the nostrils and then her forefinger coming back across the nostrils. Finally, she cleaned that hand by wiping it on her blouse.

When the bean sprouts arrived, she added some of them into a bowl of noodles with her right hand and placed the bowl in front of me.

I was immediately put off as I had not seen washing her hands before preparing it. I had lost my appetite completely.

That was the last time I ever set foot in that coffee shop to have "the best" curry mee in town!

ltbs

You shall eat the fruit of the labour of your hands; you shall be happy, and it shall be well with you.
Psalms 128:2

The Best Deals Ever …

After I was retrenched, quite some time ago, I was offered managerial positions by friends. The jobs entailed relocation to the capital city or to other countries. I had to turn down the offers because my wife and children could not relocate with me. My children were all very young then. The youngest of the three – a daughter – was born on the day of my retrenchment. After weighing all the options, I chose to be a stay-at-home-Dad to care for my children.

I started and operated a company from home. I would run the company during the day and teach at a language centre in the evenings.

I remember a lady friend – the head of a large government agency – helping me by ordering goods from me when she heard that I had been retrenched and had started the company. She would send me the local purchase orders and I would then forward them to the suppliers to ship the goods to her agency. She would then arrange for payments to be made to me for the goods supplied. She would send me the large orders every now and then. There were  the best deals ever as I need not have to do anything at all.

Unfortunately, I had to fold up the company due to financial difficulties because of bad debts.

ltbs

He that is thy friend indeed

He will help thee in thy need.

William Shakespeare

Dedicated in gratitude and friendship to Datuk Adeline Leong.

The Agony of Parting

Do birds ever pine,
When their fledglings leave the nest?
Why then do humans pine,
When their children leave home?

Do animals ever feel hurt,
When they are rejected in mating?
Why then do humans feel pain,
On being rejected in love?

ltbs

Folks, I'm telling you,
birthing is hard
and dying is mean  -
so get yourself
a little loving
in between.
Langston Huges

Tall No More

My father was rather tall for a Chinese. He was more than six foot tall. I guess I seemed to take after him when I was at primary and lower secondary schools. I was one of the tallest boys in class.

However, I suffered a serious spinal ailment after Form Two. When I was discharged from a nearly two-year stay at the hospital, I found that I had not grown in height. The ailment had stunted my growth especially my lower limbs. I had remained at about the same height as when I was first admitted as a patient. The boys who were shorter than I when we were in Form Two had all overshot me in height. I had become one of the shortest boys in class. Although I was tall no more, it did not affect me in the least.

I have never felt that I was short in all my life. I have never really thought about it, either.

ltbs

Every day, in every way, I'm getting better and better.
Emile Couè

Stop the Trash, please!

I cry for my beautiful city
When I see litter being allowed to be strewn everywhere
But I cry the most for our beloved country
When I see the trash being allowed to be disseminated
And no one's strong or brave enough
To stop this onslaught
And prevent our golden Chersonese
From being gradually and eventually
Turned into another gulag archipelago.


Carry the battle to them. Don't let them bring it to you. Put them on the offensive. And don't ever apologize for anything.
Harry S Truman

Starting the Day Right

It's 3.00 am
And I've woken up
To the stillness of the morning
But I'm quite delighted
As I can start up the computer
And do some writing.

Pouring out my soul into Cyberspace
On happy thoughts
Awakening my heart,
To the love of my loved ones
And the camaraderie of my friends
Uplifting my soul to start the day right

ltbs

What to give to those who have everything?
Give the gift of words.
Author Unknown

Soul-killing Love

Envy not anyone with a secret love,
It'd be  ecstasy and euphoria
At every secret rendezvous
But away from it
Stress of longing
Killing the soul to the core.

Envy not secret lovers,
As history has shown
Cuckoldry, illicit affairs and broken vows
Bring no one any good
Lovers being together  -  and not together
Killing the soul for evermore.

ltbs

Betrayal attracts more than fidelity.
Milan Kundera

Soothing and Tranquil Mornings

Every morning, as I ensconced myself on a rattan chair at the front yard of my retreat  -  a small house in the suburb  -  I see, over the fence, the tall trees and the shrubs; and hanging on the awnings, a few Japanese fish flags, a few tubular Balinese bamboo chimes, a bell chime from a temple, and a small set of tubular, metallic chimes from Canada.

Whenever a gentle breeze rises, the Japanese fish flags will begin to flutter, and the temple bell-chime and the tubular chimes from Canada will tinkle slightly, too. When the breeze begins to be stronger, the wind causes the Japanese fish flags to shoot and flutter wildly, and the Balinese bamboo chimes, then join in the frantic tinkling of the temple and Canadian chimes with their low stuttering sounds.

When the strong wind dies down, the Balinese chimes stop chiming, the Japanese fish flags wave gently and the smaller chimes tinkle softly. Then there is a lull as the breeze completely disappears.

I then turn to my book and enjoy a few sips of coffee while I wait for the breeze and wind to come on again to activate the flying of the fish flags and the tinkling of the chimes.

I find this morning ritual on my front yard very soothing and tranquil. I can spend hours on end there, enjoying such peace and quiet. It's here, too, that I feel the presence of the Higher Being. Would you like to join me here?

ltbs


Every day look at a beautiful picture, read a beautiful poem, listen to some beautiful music and if possible, say some reasonable thing.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Something Was Better Than Nothing

As I was coming out of a cashier counter of a supermarket, I saw someone I had not met for a long while paying the cashier at another counter so I went up to the end of the counter and waited for him.

As soon as he came out of the counter, he handed me RM50 which was part of the change he held in his hand. I was surprised but I took the money. Without saying a word, he went on his way.

The guy must have been embarrassed to see me as he had owed me nearly RM1K for years. I had not chased him for it. In fact, I had forgotten about it after I had lost contact with him.

The RM50 was better than nothing as I knew I would have to say goodbye to the rest of the money he owed me. It would be the same with rather a few others who owed me money. I gave them the loans when I was gainfully employed. I was a sucker to their sob stories when they sought my help.

ltbs

Money, says the proverb, makes money. When you have got a little, it is often easy to get more. The great difficulty is to get that little.
Adam Smith

Solitude in the Early Morning

I go to bed very easily,
But get only a five-hour quota of sleep always.
If I go to bed early
I'd wake up very early, too.

In the quiet of the small hours,
I'd read, write, surf the Net
Or watch sports on cable TV
Enjoying solitude in the stillness of the early morning.

ltbs

You will inhale happiness with the air you breathe, without dwelling on it or thinking about it.
John Sturat Mill

So You Think You Could Dance

When I was a young teacher, in my early twenties, I came to a dance at a social club one evening. There were quite a few officers and rank and files from a battalion of Irish fusiliers, stationed in the town, at the dance.

I had a Stengah in my hand at the bar while I watched the dancers on the dance floor. Very soon, I spotted an attractive, rather statuesque, young, white girl dancing. She was dancing the fast numbers  -  the jives, the rock-‘n- rolls, the cha-chas with a few young soldier boys. No one asked her to dance the waltzes.

After a couple of Stengahs, I had the Dutch courage to approach her to dance a waltz. When she stood up, she towered over me. I led her on to the dance floor and we began waltzing. I was quite apprehensive at first but we soon hugged closely and swayed gently to the rather slow soft music. Then she nestled my right cheek to her cleavage. I felt quite thrilled and comfortable dancing that way. I ended up dancing with her all the slow numbers as no one else wanted to do so.

I found out that she was the daughter of the ranking officer  -  a colonel  -  of the battalion. I had no chance of asking for her contact number as I was more thrilled dancing silently with my right cheek on her breast.

Looking back later, I felt fortunate that the young soldiers were not interested in dancing the slow numbers with her. None of them had any objections to my dancing with her, either. Otherwise, I might have been accosted and then bashed up by them after the dance.

ltbs

Dancing is the loftiest, the most moving, the most beautiful of the arts, because it is no mere translation or abstraction from life; it is life itself.

Havelock Ellis

So You Think You Can Speak English

Don't ever correct anyone who mispronounces any word in English. It's deemed rude to do so.
However, the teacher in me has done so and I've lost a few friends.
I've now become wiser. I won't say anything should I come across anyone who rattles away with a persistence  -  persisting out of habit, obstinacy or ignorance -  in an erroneous use of English. I won't correct anyone of their mumpsimus.

I remember writing articles on English for a newspaper. Whatever I had written had been sourced from books authored by professors of Oxford, Cambridge or London University.
Someone in my country wrote in to condemn me. His letter was full of sarcasm but I could see that he was quite ignorant of the basic elements of spoken English. I did not bother to reply to his letter as I knew he had been taught to speak like a book and so was ignorant of the rudimentary elements of spoken English.
( Google-search : "Don't Be Afraid to Elide - luketeoh" or "Don't Pronounce Everything - luketeoh")

ltbs

An education isn't how much you have committed to memory,
or even how much you know.
It's being able to differentiate between what you know and what you don't.
Anatole France